Wednesday, December 5, 2012

Psurgery Psyche!

Went on down to Baylor Eye Clinic for my 9:00 appt with the husby who just loves to drive Miss Crazy around the town, and saw Dr. #1. Dr. #1 proceeded to really be concerned with my shakylaky vision in my left eye, so much so that she didn't want to dilate them (I have crazy tiny pupils so they can't really see all up in there without dilation) because she was afraid the lens would further drop. She feels that Super 8 (Left Eye) might need surgery. I mean I dropped 2 lines of vision since August.

So she worked us in to see my surgeon to see what his opinion was/is.

The husby and I were prepared for this like Doomsday Preppers prepared, and we had our Kindle Fire and John left and got lunch (Chipotle- when will I learn to stop getting the chicken there. Stop it Gillian!) so when I did get in and see him at 1:20, it wasn't like a wait at all. In fact, I got so comfortable there that I considered taking my shoes off.

 Have I mentioned I have stinkless feet? It's truth. And it's amazing in the real sense of the word "amazing." If I ever ran a marathon- wait, I need to stop and insanely cackle right now- okay, I'm back, sigh, but if I ever did- wait, hahahahahfhfahfahsdfhfhahahahahahh!!!!- would my feet smell?

I guess we will never know.

Dude, I can't run long distances! What part of googly eyes don't you understand!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm not gonna run an eyeball out and make this crap elective!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 Where was I?

Oh yeah, so we were holed or is it wholed? up in BEC. I get called in my Dr. #2, this time a "Fellow."

Can a doctor type person explain that to me please? What a Fellow is?

The Fellow gets all kinds of confused, but in an intelligent way. He almost seemed to rebuke me. I give in and begin the Eye Timeline to fill him in. I could say, "Fellow, look at the vast scrolls- I mean chart." But I don't. He digests it. Then takes a look. Proceeds to talk about surgery options that Dr. Hammy will possibly consider. I know full well that no, he probably won't.

We get in to see Dr. Hammy, who I haven't seen since January- Praise Jesus!- and he takes a good look.

We are now friends, he and I and the husby. And I will forever be his patient patient.

He says no go for surgery. So I ask my usual questions:

"But when will it drop out?" (The Lens).
Dr. H: "You could be hit by a meteor. Or the Earth could swallow you up."
Me: "But I mean, is it close and what will you do then?"
Dr. H: "Stay away from you or get a shovel."
(For his sarcasm alone, I'm going to remain a patient you see.)
He continues: "It could slip in 3 weeks, then we go in and take care of it."
Me; "Is there something I can..."
Dr. H: "There is nothing you can or shouldn't do to help with it. Have a Merry Christmas!"

We prayed and so many others did. This was God's answer and His timing and we have to trust that it's not the right time.

So I adjust with the shakiness and decreased vision. This is where the mental kicks in. The patient patient I need to be that I pray I can be and I increase the zoom to 200% on everything. I start the winding down earlier and go out less.

Kind of like when I was in Kindergarten and I NEVER wanted to nap. So much that I led Nap Revolts amongst the class.

God is the Teacher who is saying, "Now, Gillian you know you need to rest."

Thank you Lord for my jello vision. Please help me to rest in You.

Thanks for your prayers beloveds. 

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