Wednesday, November 30, 2011

The ‘Best Parents Award’ Does NOT Go To…

The Hurzband and Me.

never lollypop

Looks like we missed our chance to win that highly prized Best Parents Award again! All because of a lollypop which is most likely our daughter’s euphemism for “anything fun”.

I found this the other night in the study/craft room/guest room (or the “slash room” as we should call it), and it took me aback. One, because I had already shed tears 5 minutes prior to seeing it due to my conviction that I don’t spend enough quality time with her and two, because it was a little freaky to behold and three, because it was also funny.

So I cried to John dramatically, “JOHN YOU HAVE TO COME SEE THIS!” He’s used to this beckoning by the way. Leelah was sleeping by the way. And he laughed. So I laughed. We laughed together.

What else could we do?

And I asked Leelah about it during breakfast the next day. Yes, it was what I feared it was about: “You don’t want to do stuff that I want to do and won’t let me do stuff I don’t want to do.” I wanted to say, “Remember when we totally had that Nerf Dart Gun War and attacked Daddy when he came in the door from work last week and when I sewed you the ugliest angry bird ever this weekend?” But I didn’t. I just listened.

She’s a quality timer. That’s her love language and that is hard for me. So there you go. But I won’t let the enemy use this as ammo for guilt that I’m not doing a good parenting job. I will just pray for God to carve our special moments of quality time and enjoy it all: the milk spills, the whining, the hair drying, the nose-mucus-emission, the griping, the Hi-Ho-Cherry-Ho, the sad chalkboard notes, the giggles, all of it.

I won’t wait until we go to Disneyworld to have fun. Or that perfect moment with un-spilled glitter and some beautiful craft and joyous music in the background with just enough lighting for me to photograph it for facebook. We’ll start now and be thankful for it.

1 comment:

Jon said...

In the best of circumstances young kids, particularly little girls, love to be the center of their parents' universe. Particularly as an only child Leelah is probably used to being the center of attention. So her expectations of you in terms of time and undivided attention may be a touch unrealistic. Somehow I can't imagine you and John shorting her on quality time. Just remember if it was all the time, it would not be quality time. Overdoing it can take away the "special"-ness of that time. For what it's worth I think you two are solid candidates for the best parents award. Also parents are like cops...a big part of your job is telling a person "NO" who REALLY doesnt want to hear it, and tends to react badly to it. So as long as she's still living at home, you're unlikely to win 100 percent approval ratings. You failed to serve sugar cookies and chocolate ice cream for every meal? I'm afraid you lost a few popularity points for that one. On the other hand at least your little one is not a monstrously obese 5 year old diabetic.