I'm a titch bit high maintenance...
I am dressing up for Halloween early this year as an Undead Mom. Seriously. The sickness must stop. I am about 45 min away from the doc appt where I will show them the inflamed membranes and the doc/PA will look at the meds I'm allergic to (I have a new one to add: Levaquin) she will gasp and then her schooling will come into play. I will then proceed to Targie, where I go when I'm sick and not sick, hit up my fave pharm friends, with popcorn combo already purchased and pick up said meds. I will make sure that I carry my Predisone steroids, benadryl and inhaler so when my body does react I won't get hives that will cause dermatitis again, but just a nice set of plump lips. I have to make sure I take the benadryl quickly so as not to go from Jolie lips to Platypus face. This is my life with a sinus infection. ALWAYS say yes when they offer a shot. It's like they are asking if I'd like to breathe again? YES OXYGEN NEED ME HURT FACE SNARF SNARF HELP.
WARNING: FUNNY, EMBARRASSING SITUATION ALERT!!!!!!!
And it's been fun because my body has kicked in stomach issues with this bug. There is no party in my tummy. There is a crime scene. I had to make THE MOST EMBARRASSING CALL OF MY LIFE the other day to Leelah's school and totally ruin the cred I had built with smiles, brownies and compliments with the office staff in one phone call. Now I'm on the "Diva Mom/Problem Parent" list for sure. Here is how it went:
Me, exasperated sounding: Can I pick my daughter up at 3:30 today since I am ill and cannot wait in the carpool line?
Office Friend: Well we'd prefer if you just pick her up in the car rider line. It goes pretty fast.
UNCOMFORTABLE SILENCE. I have to choose to live a lie or tell the Gosh-honest-this-is-who-I-really-am spastic, low brow and hot mess.... Here goes:
Me: I'm frequenting the bathroom....
YES, I SAID THAT AND I HATE MYSELF BUT I HAD TO. I HAAAAAAAAAAD TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! Laugh at my misfortune. Go ahead. Laugh it up. But that is the classiest way I could say that I was having unfortunate stomach troubles requiring numerous bathroom visits and a huge supply of Cottonelle Wet Ones. Come people - you know you've had this happen!!!!! If not first I hate you and secondly get your gallbladder removed and then we'll talk!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well, better throw on some facial powder and welding mask to hide my ghoulish appearance- it's doctor appt time!