I'm Challenged.

So I've mentioned that I challenged myself to read a book a week.


This is me reading Prayer: Does it Really Make a Difference. This is a real living thing called a "Blobfish" NO LIE!!! They exist at crazy deep subsea surfaces. Leelah and John are obsessed with it right now.

Yeah, I got a little perturbed at the book I was reading, Prayer: Does it really make a difference by Phillip Yancey and also got sent into a downward spiral of sadness over it (excuses!), ergo my timeline got a little screwy with it. I ALREADY HAD QUESTIONS. I DON'T WANT TO READ ABOUT MORE QUESTIONS!!!!! I tried y'all. I got to chapter 18 and mentally threw up. As my mom-in-love always says, "There are too many good books out there." Plus, she's a high school librarian! How's that for credibility!?

Back on track now with Jackie Kendall (a firecracker of a person- love her!) and her book: Free Yourself to Love: The Liberating Power of Forgiveness. I've even been asked by a friend to review it on her blog! Which I'm a little over-excited about. So far in a word: inspiring! Yes, it's got some heavy stuff she has dealt with, but so do I and it's put out there with an attempt to get it moving and get towards healing. Not just dropped on the table like a bowl of sadness staring at you (Phillip Yancey!). I'm sorry! I respect him as an author and respect his education, but and period.

Here's some books on my list for the summer:
-Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier(Mom-in-love's rec)
-Overcoming Emotions that Destroy by Chip Ingram (whatever do you mean? I don't have those kind of emotions? Sarcasm on full capacity)
-The Help by Kathryn Stockett
-The Same Kind of Different As Me by Denver Moore and Ron Hall (my Aunt-in-love knows the authors!?!)
-The Mom Factor by Cloud and Townsend
-Maybe a sci-fi book that John would recommend (trying to read some of my friend's favorites)
-Authentic Faith by Gary Thomas
-Truly Fed by Gari Meacham (Thankfully I don't have an eating disorder, but I sure do feel comfortable going to food when I'm sad, happy, mad, bored, etc.)
-Living a Prayer Life by Jennifer Kennedy Dean (Want to get on the JKD bus!)

So I'm open to suggestions here. I don't want to deter anyone from commenting although I think my blog might have some kind of stank on it anyway that deters people naturally, but please don't say Francine Rivers. I've tried. She goes to places I can't go. Places that I don't understand why anyone else would want to go with her.

As far as life stuff. Glurgh. I've been "holy benched" it seems. Not really doing much of anything with a purpose: to grieve. Mainly I just have pity parties. Does that count as grieving? Or I sit around with my arms crossed whining, "But it's summer and I don't wanna grieeeeeve!"

My counselor told me a genius piece of advice: schedule heavy thinking times everyday. Just one time (hr, 30min) a day to journal it all out, cry to God, talk to Him, vent to Him. And then done. Now, my brain always wants to open up the HT time throughout the day, I have to tell it "No! We'll think about this tomorrow!" And write it down if it's just so pressing for retrospection tomorrow. What do you think? Let me tell you, the day I don't have my HT times and let my grieving heart run a marathon all over my brain- is not a good day. Not a good day for anyone in my home sadly. Just thought I'd share!