Monday, March 22, 2010

Wheyening. (Whining)

Darn it all to heck!

Lord, what is going on? Why is the screen I'm looking at moving this way and that! Was there peyote in my carnation instant breakfast today? No. I know that much. Father, what is up? Did I mistakingly pray for patience or something!? I don't recall doing that... I guess I will trust you then. Heavenly Father God, please give me heavenly patience in my affliction. Thank you in advance for shaping me through this. Let me not be a complainer, but an advacator of your grace which is sufficient. I may not understand why I'm going through these vision woes, but I will consider it pure joy! You obviously are not done with me yet! Thank you Father, for my husband who loves me and rolls with the punches better than Evander Holyfield. He is my earthly rock. I can't believe he still answers my calls! Thank you for making him so good. May my eye maintenance that is so high maintenance be used for your glory Lord. In your son's name I pray, Amen.

Friends I have to stop, drop and pray right now. Do you take these moments? Where you bank-chute your worries to God. My bank-chute tube is crammed with junk. But God is the ultimate bank teller of my life. Thank goodness.

Left eye be a wobblin'. It moves slowly from side to side like a baby swing. Dang it.
Right eye has started shakin'. It moves jerky like I'm shaking a pepper shaker.
WHY.
Okay, I know why- ectopia lentis et pupillae. But I don't really know why so I'm going to Dr. Lewis (flubber smart mad eye doc) to get some answers tomorrow. Which means I'll have both eyes dilated most likely. Heaven help me. I get to experience legal blindness in both eyes again for several hours. Oh well! At least I won't see the shaky vision right!?

Today I called Leelah's preschool and notified them we most likely won't be able to finish out the year due to my vision issues. I told a "kinda know" (Safety 1-2-3 video rocks!) person all about my freak eyes and explained to her how yes, I haven't a clue what is happening with my eyes, but that God has given me such great peace. She then said something about a great attitude that I had; which I quickly shot that the glory up to the Lord on that one. I also told her, "I have to". I have to have a good attitude. What else would I do? Be mopey? Gross. That doesn't mean I didn't subsequently cry it out to Johnicles on the phone. Oh sweet man he is.

I feel better. Thank you blogspot. I just wanted to share with you a little come to Jesus moment that I was having. I hope this prompts you to do the same with whatever storm you are dealing with in your life. It can be a category 1 storm even or a kill storm level 8- God can take it.

4 comments:

jenna said...

I love you, Gillian. Thanks for putting my life into perspective, for helping me "see" the positives. Haha.

I am blanket-praying for you - that God would cover over all those issues: health, attitude, family, and whatever else He deems me to pray for you. :) Thanks for this blog post.

Wendy said...

You are blessed with a darling baby girl and a fabulous husband. I am praying for you...and I love your attitude and your honesty!!

Lesly said...

Gilly!! Love you girl and your honesty. :) I also totally love the yellow background on the blog! Praying for the appointment tomorrow.

Kenzie said...

Love you girl... you have a beautiful attitude and although I know you don't always want to be positive, it's who you are!! It's who God created you to be and you are perfect. I am praying for your eyes and this mountain that seems insurmountable at times. If I can help you with Leelah, PLEASE let me know! I'm sure she's have fun with Deacon and even Faith Clare.